Sunday Scribblings: instructions

How to have a miserable day:

1. As soon as you wake up, take note of any small way the weather does not conform to your preferences.
2. Quickly turn on the TV or radio to the news...or the traffic report.
3. If you drive to work, strive to get in front of someone...anyone.
4. Pay close attention to what everyone you see is doing and find fault with something small.
5. Spend some time wishing you were somewhere else.
6. When that gets boring, switch to wishing you were someone else.
7. Center your thoughts on past mistakes...yours or someone else's...either will work.
8. Close your eyes for a few minutes to fully feel how the universe is conspiring against you.
9. Keep mental notes (write them down if you need to) on how your work falls short of perfection.
10. Take care to think only of yourself.

That should do it, but if you’re not all the way down in the dumps yet, go to the top of the list and try again.